02 - Mistaken Identity

"What’s he doing now?" asks Flatfoot. Just seconds ago, a golden blur heralded his arrival under the pavilion. Flatfoot wears a simple blue costume with yellow lightning bolts and shoulder pads, a large letter F emblazoned on his chest. He hands a coffee cup to Teckstyle.

"Still standing there," the man in the red and yellow armor says. The subject in question is a solitary troll standing on a bridge over the Red River. The two heroes had decided to camp out in the pavilion on one end of the bridge, largely for the shade.

"Mind if I ask a question?" Flatfoot says after a moment of silence.

"What?"

"How do you drink coffee through that helmet?"

In response, a small circle opens up where the mouth would be, and a small metal straw pokes out. Teckstyle holds the cup up to the straw and takes a sip.

"Ah, clever."

A strange gurgling sound comes from within the helmet, followed by a fit of coughing.

"You all right?"

"Too…hot…" Teckstyle manages.

"Oh, sorry about that, see, moving at super speed is a really great way of warming stuff up thanks to friction, so your double shot latte there is hotter than it was in the spigot. I figured you’d know about that, being a scientist and all."

"What makes you think I’m a scientist?"

"Well you got that…suit there that flies around and shoots…stuff."

"Its called energy."

"What kind of energy?"

"Eh, you know, blue."

"…You don’t know do you? And you call yourself a scientist," Flat snorts.

"I never said I was a scientist."

Flatfoot scowls. "You aren’t very good at this ‘mentoring’ thing, are you?"

"I’ve only been at this for a month longer than you."

Flatfoot looks over to the troll, still standing there. "Hey, you wanna hear my secret origin?"

"No." Teckstyle says flatly, taking a sip from the cooling coffee.

"Well, I’m bored, so too bad. See, it all started about a month and a half ago. There was this one hero, guy calling himself Flatfoot who super speed and reflexes from a lightning strike, so he did the obvious thing, put on tights and go arrest people, right? So some scientist buddy of his hooks him up with a pair of shoulder pads," Flatfoot taps his own shoulder. "The pads helped him focus his speed powers better, so he could run really fast. Anyway, this guy fought crime for a while, right, then lightning struck twice, literally when he pushed me, a regular Joe out of the way of an oncoming car. One explosion later, all that was left of this first Flatfoot were his shoulder pads, and I got super speed. Are you even listening to me?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. So you became a hero to honor his memory or something."

"Well, yeah, that’s one of the reasons. I’m also in it for the large free bags of cash."

"Large…free…bags…?"

Flatfoot offers him his license. "See, its all right there on my ID card."

"So why’d you even bother telling me all this?" refusing to take the card.

"Like I said, I’m bored, and its not like anything else is going on. So what’s your origin?"

"Top secret. If I told you, I’d have to kill you, and its not worth the red tape. Very complicated."

"Aw, c’mon. At least tell me why the name. I mean, when I think of "textiles" I think of flax."

"Can it, sidekick, someone’s going up to our mark."

"You…you just called me ‘sidekick’," Flatfoot beams.

"Yeah, yeah. See that, I told you this troll was a pusher, look at that, some fool in tights is probably trying to get an ‘edge’ in his fight on crime." Teckstyle shakes his head. "Shameful."

"Well, we’d better get over there and put a stop to it, right? We see crime and we stop it, that’s the procedure."

"Yep, power up, we’re going in."

A few seconds later, the two heroes charge out of the pavilion, a blast of energy flooring the confused hero and a swift kick to the head brings down the troll. "Just say no to Superadine, got it?!" shouts Flatfoot triumphantly.

"What you doing?" the troll grunts from beneath. A name tag on his vest reads "Hello, my name is Julius." "Me report this to your supervisor!" The nameless hero has by now fled screaming.

"Er, you mean you’re not pushing superadine on the unsuspecting heroes of Paragon City?" Teckstyle asks hesitantly.

"No! Me not like other trolls. Me hate Atta. Me hate Superadine."

"Oh," Flatfoot and Tecksyle grunt, not making eye contact with Julius.

Ten minutes later, after a police drone escort, the two heroes stand sheepishly in front of Lt. Dave Wincott, head of the trolls task force.

"And there you have it, Sir," Teckstyle says. "That’s what happened."

"We’re, uh, really sorry about the mix up."

"Gentlemen, I just don’t know what to say. Julius has been on of the Hollows’ most stalwart sources of information. I’m just relieved he’s decided to forgive this little ‘incident’." Wincott says, glowering through his sunglasses.

"Would a letter of apology help?"

"No." Wincott glares. "Besides, I don’t think Julius can read," he adds. "Of course, you realize, you’re going to be punished."

The two heroes nod slowly.

"Now, Flatfoot, You’re already in hot water for trying to arrest Flux-"

"He was dressed as an Outcast!"

"He’s supposed to, he’s undercover! And Teckstyle, you caused quite the ruckus by setting off an alpha strike under the Atlas Statue."

"Hey, I tripped-"

"Miss Liberty’s costume was almost blown off."

"Heh, that was pretty funny-I mean, um, sorry." Teckstyle says, stifling a laugh.

Wincott shakes his head. "Gentlemen, Freedom Corps. has asked that you two be put on double secret probation."

"Can they do that?" Flatfoot whispers to Teckstyle, who shrugs.

"Double secret probation!" Wincott says again, louder. "That means I’m remanding you to community service."

"Aww man…," Flatfoot groans. "…Wait a minute, isn’t that what we’re doing already?"

Lt. Wincott rubs his temples for a moment. "Together, I mean. Here’s a list of things to do. You will be monitored at all times. Get started, and get out of the Hollows."

As the two heroes walk away from the Hollows, Teckstyle looks at his new partner in crime fighting. "Remind me never, ever to go to the Hollows again."

Flatfoot looks at the list. "Oh no…"

"What?"

"We have to patrol Galaxy City for Vazhilok activity."

"You’re kidding…"

"Nope. Then we have to defeat five Hellions."

"Well that doesn’t sound so bad…"

"And then we have to do that again. For six pages."

"Ouch. How many pages is it, Flat?"

Flatfoot flips through the list faster than the normal eye can read. "A hundred and six."

Teckstyle begins to smack his fist against his helmet repeatedly.

"So, since we’ve got time now Teck, can I call you Teck? Howabout laying that secret origin on me?"

"Oh shut up."